I want to be stable, emotionally stable and fit, I want to be more than a memory, I want to be a forever to Mia. I want to be able to put the lessons I have learnt into good practice. I want to learn to live for me, learn to love me without restrictions. I want to be proud of me, proud of how far I have come, proud of how far I will possibly go. I want to grow up not go up. I want to be better than I was 20years ago, better than I was 15years ago, better than I was 10years ago, better than I was 5years ago and better than I was yesterday.
I want to embark on this journey of soul-searching and self- discovery and not give up or deviate half way through. I want to be a better person, better girlfriend, better wife, better mum, better friend, better daughter and a better sister. I want to be so much better. I want to be a stable and reliable pillar for my loved one and to the people who will come into my life. I want to be better, so much better.
This is not unrealistic, not too much its what I want, its what I need and I believe its not impossible although it took me years to finally know I can be better and took me months to want to be better but now I know, now I am sure and I am willing to work for it.
And about those fine walls I built which prevented me for fighting for better, those walls are down, Mia brought them down with his love, loyalty,patience and support, Mia came into my life and gave me a real challenge, Mia came into my life and awakened my crave for betterment, not just for him and our relationship but mostly for me. Its not gonna be a one day thing, Lord knows how long it will take but nothing good comes overly easy, so I am gonna sit tight and go through this journey with the hope everything will eventually fall into place.